Hypnosis for Overcoming Shame

07 Jun 2024

0 Comment

Shame Can Destroy a Person’s Life

Shame is a devastating emotion which can destroy a person’s life if allowed to persist. Feeling ashamed of what they’ve done, thought, felt, or fantasized about can lead a person to give up on themselves—to withdraw and isolate themselves from others, to sabotage their goals and dreams because they feel unworthy, to beat themselves up with constant negative self-talk and accusations.

Left untreated, shame will fester in the subconscious mind and rob a person of their self-respect, self-confidence, self-esteem, self-worth, and self-care. Suffering from shame often causes depression, self-loathing, and sometimes even a desire to escape the only way they know how—to commit suicide.

Recovering from Shame

But shame need not be an excruciating, harmful life or death sentence. Overcoming shame, by learning to forgive and accept oneself, and to choose constructive behavior to be proud of, is definitely possible. But in most cases, overcoming shame requires therapy.

Hypnotherapy embraces a variety of the therapeutic modalities described below to help clients overcome their crippling (and most often undeserved) shame.

Using Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) helps clients understand connections between their thoughts and emotions, and the resulting behaviors. Thoughts like “I’m a bad person” and being ashamed too often result in behavior that reinforces the shame, such as not telling the truth about what you did. It’s especially important to identify automatic thoughts that go unnoticed, such as “I don’t deserve anything good because I made a mistake by hiding what I did.”
Dialectical behavior therapy (DBT): DBT is an extension of CBT that helps clients work through their shame by teaching them to identify and label their negative emotions, to learn to regulate those emotions when they occur, for example, by self-soothing techniques, and accept that how they felt and what they did is past. DBT encourages a “clear mind” among those battling shame. Clients are encouraged to better understand the expectations they put on themselves, then to recognize how those expectations, such as always being perfect and never making mistakes, are not realizable.
Motivational interviewing: Motivational interviewing is a technique that helps clients recognize that going forward, they can choose not to repeat the behavior they are ashamed of, and choose to behave better, and more effectively, by pursuing their goals. Motivational interviewing encourages exercising free choice and engaging in a process of self-actualization.
Conducting support groups: Support groups, with or without group hypnosis, can enable clients who are ashamed to share their struggles to find emotional support from members who have experienced shame and are willing to discuss it openly.

Hypnosis for Self-Acceptance

In a hypnotic state/trance, the subconscious mind is open to accepting suggestions and commands that encourage their acceptance of themselves despite whatever flaws they see. Without a sufficient level of self-acceptance, they risk turning to new maladaptive behaviors that would reinforce their shame. In hypnosis they reject thoughts, such as, “I am a loser,” or “I am an addict” and start replacing those thoughts with constructive ones that encourage their recovery. “I am a good person who deserves forgiveness for my mistake,” and “I reject feeling ashamed for my mistake and embrace self-acceptance and self-love.”

Hypnosis for Self-forgiveness

In hypnosis clients suffering from shame accept suggestions and commands that they deserve to forgive themselves for any thoughts, actions or feelings that they are ashamed of.

Yes, it is easy for a client to consciously beat him/herself up with hindsight about the behavior that caused them shame. But under hypnosis, a client commanded to reject the shame they want to reject, and to accept the self-forgiveness they want to accept, will do so in order to heal and choose constructive behavior they are proud of going forward.

Getting Help to Overcome Your Shame

If you are suffering from shame that may be destroying your well-being, self-confidence, and motivation to achieve your goals, live your dreams, and to make the most of your life, please seek help. If you would like to learn about hypnosis and hypnotherapy, go to mindworkshypnotherapy.com.

If you would like a free consultation to discuss hypnotherapy to overcome your shame, contact Ellen at: [email protected] or call or text her at (310) 422-9913.

Testimonials

"If you are looking for someone who is so thorough and truly caring about your needs, Ellen is for you. She doesn’t look at the time and end a session just because your time is up. She probes to get to the heart of issues, and will problem-solve with you to address the issue. She even helped me determine the best approach for presenting data for a critical meeting I was having. Then, she remembers and follows up. Her hypnotherapy sessions are clearly customized for each area of need and get to the heart of the matter. I am truly thankful for her and her dedication and talent! I highly recommend attending multiple sessions with her!" - M. B.
"I had a session with Ellen in 2009 to guide me beyond corporate life, and I’d like to share that I have referenced her wisdom often through this past decade and am happy and thriving in my life." - Bonnie B.
"Life’s pressures and struggles, combined with past trauma and family history, led me to ask my sister for a referral. She didn’t hesitate to refer me to Ellen. At that point, anger and sadness were overwhelmingly taking over my day-to-day; all I knew is I wanted to not be radiating so much negativity. This was my first experience with hypnotherapy but I took the leap and, boy, was I transformed. The 1st session was not as successful but, with each session, Ellen was able to take me to my zen, to help me reform my reactionary thoughts so that different stimuli didn’t affect me so much. She listens and makes you feel comfortable opening up. She then customizes the sessions based on need. I can’t thank Ellen enough for all her assistance, her personal investment in my success, and just her warm sensibility. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart, Ellen!! Heidi H." - Heidi H.
"Ellen is a breath of fresh air. As a service provider, she makes no equivocation about your importance to her. She is flexible, understanding, and sincerely looking to help. As a professional, I was impressed by how she focused each session to my needs. Ellen wants to understand her clients and our underlying issues, and shows it by the time and care she takes to craft each session accordingly. I came to Ellen broken and clueless; I left Ellen’s meticulous care mended and more knowledgeable about me as a person. Ellen helped me with issues of self-sabotage, and now I catch myself before it ever happens. This would not have been possible without Ellen’s expertise. I had never done hypnotherapy, and now thanks to Ellen, I swear by it. If you want to truly heal, give Ellen a call. she will take care of you." - Colsas O.
"I am a professional bass player and music teacher. I bought some of Ellen’s Guided Imagery Hypnosis audio recordings from her website about four years ago, and have been listening to them weekly ever since when I start to feel anxious or stressed. This can be from performance anxiety or just feeling overwhelmed. Listening to these tapes has been helpful to my career as a musician, and to my general well-being. I can’t imagine how I would have gotten through the past few years transitioning from music school to being a freelance musician without these tapes. I would highly recommend Mindworks! I have also been using the hypnosis recordings from Mindworks Hypnotherapy for about 6 years. I listen to the “Polishing your Trophies” and the “Guided Imagery for Stress Relief” recordings for about 15 minutes every time I start to feel overwhelmed with work, relationships, or general anxiety. These self-hypnosis tools have really helped me to find a resting place where I can feel recharged and optimistic. I would highly recommend Mindworks Hypnotherapy to anyone who is interested in overcoming their personal hurdles, and is willing to give it a real chance. These hypnotherapy audio recordings have truly helped me to become a more fulfilled and open-minded person." - Henry S.
"I think often of the impact you had on our girls at Neighborhood Youth Association years ago, and how it made all the difference in the world to them. Two of the girls who were the primary “bully/victim” pair, became best friends immediately following your intervention and are still best friends to this day, post grad school. What you did changed their lives. Thank you!!" - Dawn M-F
"Hypnotherapy with Ellen Coleman has been highly beneficial for me. I had a session with her a couple of years ago and she helped me get rid of eczema, which had been plaguing me for quite some time. She listened carefully to what I said about my situation and then incorporated my words into the hypnotherapy session. I found listening to that hypnotherapy tape quite helpful. Most recently, I had a hypnotherapy session with Ellen Coleman regarding grief and globus pharynges. The hypnotherapy tape from that session has been, and continues to be, most helpful for healing both of these issues. I am indeed grateful! I highly recommend Ellen Coleman for hypnotherapy. She is excellent! Five stars!" - Sherry M.
"Ellen is extremely committed to her work. Helping her clients achieve their objectives is of the utmost importance to her. The sessions I have had with Ellen have far exceeded my expectations. She truly goes above and beyond to make certain her clients are not merely satisfied but happy with their results. It is unlikely you could find someone that would be more committed to her clients’ well being." - N.J.
"Ellen is a gifted and talented therapist. I found her about 9 years ago out of complete desperation and she changed my life for the better when doctors, medicine and other therapists could not. Fast forward to 2017, I don't live in the area but I really need her help so I called her and she has been able to help me remotely. Ellen is so interesting and takes so much time to get to know you and truly understand your situation. I feel so fortunate to have her work with me and now I know she is only a phone call away." - Cari B.
"I was a hypnotherapy client of Ellen Coleman’s. In my experience, Ellen has the highest integrity. She is thoroughly prepared, thoughtful, considerate, and judicious in her practice. Ellen seems highly responsible and sensitive to client needs, concerns, and confidentiality. I would absolutely refer her to my friends! Very appreciative of her work." - LA Actress
"I came to Ellen at the beginning of a devastating divorce. It was sudden, overwhelming, and completely over after 15 years. Thank God I found Ellen. She helped me to pull myself together and find my inner strength and confidence.
Being an actor, I was afraid I’d fall apart and not be able to function in auditions, but Ellen helped me find my center of perspective…my core power. Two weeks after the breakup I booked a guest spot on the hit television show “Glee”. Thank you, Ellen. I listen to my MP3’s often." - D.F.
"I came to Ellen skeptical of whether hypnotherapy works or not, but I came to her anyway about a specific law school class I was having trouble with. I was in my last semester of law school. Long story short, I had to repeat this same course I had passed in my first semester of law school (no, did NOT cheat), taking this class four more times. I was distraught because I knew the subject inside out but for some reason I could not pass it one more time and needed to in order to graduate. My mother believed I had a mental block and wanted me to try hypnotherapy. I had my doubts about hypnotherapy but was willing to try it!
Through several sessions, Ellen helped me overcome the subconscious mental block she also believed I had. Listening to the hypnotherapy recordings by Ellen daily, I broke through the mental block and obtained a 3.6 in this class! As a side effect of the hypnotherapy, I also received a 4.0 in the other two courses I was taking my last semester.
Ellen is genuinely supportive of me and my ability to succeed, not only through hypnotherapy, but in talking to me to see how I am doing. She keeps a positive and upbeat mind and relays that to me both consciously and subconsciously that you can do anything you put your mind to. I drove three hours one way to see Ellen and will continue to see Ellen when needed. I am a true believer in hypnotherapy and saying Thank you seems so little for what Ellen has done for me, but nonetheless, thank you Ellen I will always be grateful for your help and support! Obviously, I highly recommend Ellen!" - J.N.
"I was at a crossroads with my career and needed help. I had been to traditional counseling but I needed something, someone, to help get me to the next level. Sometimes getting the advice of family and friends only goes so far. And self help books work to a point. I needed to connect mind, body, and soul. I was fortunate enough to find Ellen.
My journey with Ellen started four years ago with career issues. I was at the top of my game but not very happy. Through her guidance and top-notch advice, I made a career change which I never thought I could handle. Four years later, I still love what I do, I am extremely content, and I’m conductiong business on my terms. What a difference!
My sessions with Ellen have evolved into deeper issues about relationships, family, and the ups and downs life brings. Ellen brings compassion and genuine interest into everything she does. It’s like I’ve known Ellen my whole life. She takes copious notes and really listens. She has a way of making you feel so at ease and comfortable. She never judges…she is there for you 100%.
The truly unique thing about Ellen is that she gives you practical advice in addition to the amazing hypnotherapy work that she excels in. She’s the whole package. I would whole heartedly recommend Ellen to anyone who wants to take things to another level of awareness, to learn the cocnepts of breathing and meditation, and to focus on the important things in life. I consider Ellen my mentor and spiritual advisor, and I’m so grateful to have found her in my life." - Nancy N.
"The first time I met Ellen Coleman, I knew we would get along well together. She had a warm presence and an uninhibited laugh. She seemed to ask just the right questions in our sessions and I saw results rather quickly. I believe that when doing hypnotherapy as a patient, you have to trust the person guiding you through it. It is a slightly scary endeavor. Part of the effectiveness of the treatment is allowing the person to take you to a relaxation level that you would not otherwise achieve. Ellen did that for me. Of all her talents that I have seen, I believe that her caring and inspired dialogue during hypnotherapy helped me the most. I recommend Ellen to anyone wanting to achieve their goals with someone that truly cares about them." - Jon S.
"This thank-you email is long overdue. About three years ago, I contacted you for help with my anxiety and a phobia of flying that I had developed. I couldn’t even go to an airport without getting a fever. My body felt like it was shutting down whenever I thought about flying. I contacted you because I was desperate to be able to fly again. My family lives in the Midwest and I had to take the train 36 hours each way to be able to visit them. The trips were killing with me. I had never done hypnotherapy before, but had heard through friends that it could help me.
I found your website and you scheduled me for an appointment within a few days. You were so kind to me. You met with me in the evenings and even over the phone the few weeks before I was scheduled to fly. I am so grateful to you because, since our therapy, I have been able to successfully fly without fear. The first couple of times that I flew, I used the techniques and tapes that you made me. It was difficult, but I was able to control my fear. I am now at the point where I can fly without any fear. Sometimes I even fall asleep on the planes! I never thought that was possible.
I am so grateful for everything that you taught me. Because of you, I was able to conquer my fear… there is no therapist I trust more than you. Thank you again for everything you have done for me. I will always be grateful." - Julie M.
"I had been on a personal development journey for about ten years before I met Ellen, so I was no stranger to reading self-help books and cds. Even with all my efforts, I had very little success and felt I had hit a plateau. Ellen was very understanding and listened intently to what I wanted to accomplish. She took ownership of my success and we worked as partners to construct a road map that would eventually pay significant dividends. Since working with Ellen, I have overcome my plateau and accomplished the goals I set for myself. The techniques Ellen taught me have helped me manifest my desires intentionally rather than by chance. I am forever indebted to Ellen for her kind words and encouragement." - Eduardo H.
"I turned to hypnotherapy to resolve anxiety after trying traditional therapy and feeling that I was not getting anywhere with that approach. Working with Ellen, I felt that I was constructively moving towards health. The things that I felt were missing in traditional therapy were evident in the work we did. I feel that I learned actual physical techniques for controlling anxiety. I was doing process work to achieve my goals rather than simply talking about them for a short time once a week.
Ellen’s preparation for our sessions was insightful and intelligent. During session, she nurtured and coached me instead of merely listening. She applies a keen intuition and thus is able to conduct a richer conversation about the goals you wish to work on and the means to achieve them. I would recommend her as a true partner in attaining your therapeutic goals." - Guy W.
"I have been going to Ellen Coleman for over three years. At this stage I consider her a friend.
When I first went to her I could not do very much with my right hand, arm, and shoulder. I was very bad with my right foot and leg.
I have found her to be a wonderful therapist. Through her patient work with me I have gained tremendously. Right now my right hand is open and flexible. I can do small things with it; for example, I can hold a pen, write my name, and carry light objects. I can also left my arm up high.
My right foot has improved a lot. I can walk for 45 minutes every morning, and lift my leg off the ground fairly high.
It takes time — a lot of time, but in waiting for the therapy to work we have to be patient. What Ellen Coleman does with me is unbelievable, and that’s the truth." - Sister Danielle Rushe
"I made a great discovery during vacation. I decided to go back to school to get my teaching credential; I believe the hypnotherapy gave me the courage to do so! And the tapes you made for me have been great." - Julia M.
"I met Ellen Coleman at a time in my life when I was in the middle of a career change and had specific goals I needed to achieve to accomplish this. I was filled with fear, anxiety, and self-sabotage. I could not overcome these obstacles on my own. I had tried traditional therapy but did not see results, so I turned to hypnotherapy as a last resort. After researching hypnotherapists in the area, I chose Ellen because of a very positive conversation on the phone.
Ellen demystifies the perception of hypnotherapy as some mysterious hocus pocus. She is committed to the highest ethical standards in her treatment, while being compassionate and generous at heart. She enjoys a genuine love for people and is determined to help.
After each session with Ellen, I was confident and motivated. I was able to control my emotions and work towards my goals, meeting with success every time. I highly recommend treatment with Ellen in hypnotherapy for anyone who wants to make positive changes in their lives." - Carmelina Trichilo
"I took a four week class with Ms. Coleman at the Santa Monica YMCA in Hypno-Fitness. She has a very pleasant voice and is very friendly. She was very articulate and informative regarding her techniques and practices, and provided excellent hand-outs which enabled us to follow along as she explained things and to understand the process.
I particularly valued her having people participate in each step of the progression of classes and her using volunteers to demonstrate the techniques she applies with clients in her private practice. She also explained self-hypnosis so well that it gave me confidence I could do this if I practiced.
I would recommend this program, or individual help with Ellen to anyone interested in bettering themselves or their behavior." - Ruthann Shanley
"Being a client of Ellen Coleman has been a tremendously satisfying and rich experience for me. She is thoroughly professional, and deeply empathetic to the needs and feelings of her clients. My hypnosis sessions with Ellen have helped me enormously in many ways. Those around me regularly comment that I seem mentally and emotionally stronger than ever, with enhanced confidence and self esteem. Ellen’s patience and guidance, and her very effective use of hypnosis, has helped me cope with a difficult emotional time in my life, that coincided with considerable career stress. With her help I have come through this period with flying colors, and am ready to take on life’s challenges with renewed strength and vigor." - Shane Rodgers
" I highly recommend Ellen Coleman and Mindworks Hypnotherapy. Ellen’s voice is wonderful and soothing to hear. She knows how to get someone to open up quickly by asking simple pointed questions.
Ellen’s technique of using my feelings and responses to those questions in her guided hypnosis is astounding. She formulated a personal hypnosis session to counteract my negative thought patterns and replace them with positive ideas, feelings and images.
It’s up to you not to resist, so you can go faster and deeper into hypnosis. Ellen has taught me to recognize my negative talk and how to stop it. She has helped me with breaking bad habits.
Her sessions, which are 1 1/2 hours, are never in a rush. Ellen records each one for free and sends it to you the next day so you can listen to the them over and over again to implant new mind patterns.
She taught me that you are not your brain and how to use your mind to change your brain. How to unleash your subconscious! Thanks Ellen! You taught me SO much! " - C. L.